Tuesday, May 5, 2009

The Latest

Anyone else ready for this pregnancy to be over with yet? Ha ha, well bare with me... We're almost done!

I am one of those people who truly loves being pregnant. I actually like the part where you get super round and gain lots of weight! I was so excited to be pregnant a second time and go through all of the joys and excitement of it again. Definitely no regrets and I totally see myself doing it a third time (don't worry, not any time too soon), but I think it's time for Joshua Daniel Gunning to come the heck on out! We're very excited to meet him and see what he looks like. This pregnancy has obviously been kind of tough between being pretty sick and down and out in the beginning and then being on bed rest for 14 weeks (3 1/2 months!) but we're very lucky that we didn't have any serious complications or scares. And of course, what a blessing for this little guy to make it to full term and alleviate a lot of the fears and anxiety about having a preemie again. The less time spent in the hospital, the better!

I won't lie and say that I am not worried and nervous and anxious though. Yes, it makes it a little easier to know what to expect the second time. You sort of feel like a "pro" but it doesn't take away my two very real worries -- (1) I just want to know that Joshua is healthy and okay and (2) I so desperately want the transition to go as smoothly as possible for Jakey. No matter how emotionally prepared I try to make myself, it doesn't take away the guilt that I still somehow manage to feel about Jake being upset about us "replacing him". (If only he knew how far away from the truth that really was....). I also don't think I will ever be able to be prepared for the profound emotions that will take over when Jake comes to the hospital to see me and his new little brother for the first time. Let's just say that I am sure I won't have dry eyes. But I know Jake and I will always share a special bond since he is my first and that will always be something that he and I have together. He's a little trooper. He'll probably give his little brother a smack on the head and then be on his merry way looking for food :-)

You might wonder if I have thought about how it's possible to love a second child as much as the first.... Because let's be honest, there is nothing in this world that is as strong as the love you feel for your first baby. I still to this day cannot imagine loving anyone or anything more than Jake. It just feels impossible. But I know that I will love this new little guy just as much and for different reasons and the four of us will just feel right together as a family.

As for the latest on the medical stuff.... I had another check up today (I should have my own special parking spot) and I am still only about 1 cm dilated but my doctor said that my cervix has definitely started to thin out and the baby's head is pretty low so labor could definitely start on its own before Thursday. But of course, there is no way to know for sure so it's still just the "wait and see" game. But given that it seems he will wait until he is forced to come out, the events for Thursday are as follows:
7:30am -- check in to hospital
9:30am -- c-section scheduled (with Dr. Martin, the lady that Paul just so happened to sell a car to last week.... had to throw in that anecdote. They are like best friends now!)
10am -- Joshua should be born around this time if everything is on schedule
10:30am -- Joshua and I go to PACU for recovery
11:30am -- moved to our own room
I assume that we should be allowed to go home on Sunday morning if everything goes well and according to plan.

And a side note about Jakey.... the poor little man is pretty sick :-( He came down with a 102/103 fever yesterday. You can just tell he does not feel good at all. His cheeks are all flushed and he has those glassy eyes and is all cuddly and clingy and sleepy. We took him to the doctor first thing this morning and he has tonsilitis -- the viral kind, not the bacterial kind. So it's basically like strep throat but antibiotics won't get rid of it. We just have to let it run its course, which is about 5-7 days. He should be okay to go back to day care once the fever has been gone for 24 hours but we're just taking one day at a time. He will be home with Paul and I tomorrow so some extra R&R and TLC might be just what he needs!

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